Friends.

So i dont have a Bestest friends. Like a person who considers me there bestest over everyone else. I hate it. Im not even anyones second best friend. No one trust me but yet i dont really do anything to have anyone not trust me? I use to be close to so many people but for some reason when i get people really close they meet new people and dont care about me anymore, ive been replaced by three people i considered my best friends in the last couple months. And now im becoming someone that well isnt me, because im afriad to be myself anymore that people wont like me and i will loose all my friends, ive had it done ones, in eigth grade i lost almost all my friends except like five and i dont want it to happen again.